Is that the best they can do?

(Warning this post is likely to offend, well, most people actually.)

Yes there have been a spate of particularly rubbish attempted Terrorist attacks over the past few days. If this really is the best that Al Qaeda have to offer, then we really don't have too much to worry about. Yes it could have been a lot worse, and yes people could have been injured... but they weren't, so just calm down. In fact an hour before the world's worst parking attempt, my good acquaintance Richard Jobson passed through Glasgow Airport on the way to rehearse for the impending Skids Reunion Tour. Just think, if they had forgotten to put their clocks forward, those two chargrilled islamists would have been hailed as national saviours rather than getting banged up for 50 years. Anyway, points of note over the whole affair:

1) Gordon Brown's entrance to the cameras immediately after the London car bombs were discovered. This was painfully stage managed, and reminds you just how effortless Blair made all this seem. What is bizarre is how Gordon has to come though a door and walk down a corridor looking busy but in control, before he "happens" on the cameras. (watch this here) It has the feeling of a Jackanory episode rather than the Prime Minister addressing the nation... "Hello Children! I've just been chairing a meeting with lots of important people with guns. After the break we're going to sing a song about 90 Days detention."

2) In the speech itself, Gordon said "We will not yield, we will not be intimidated and we will not allow anyone to undermine our British way of life." This is almost word for word exactly what Blair said immediately after the July 7th Bombings. And presumably if the emulation of Blair continues, Gordon will soon do the exact opposite of what he said, and use the attacks to undermine our way of life and introduce a slew of liberty eroding anti terror legislation.

3) The New home secretary, Jaqui Smith, has now raised the "terror level" to Red Level meaning Critical. This involved a junior civil servant legging it round the corner to the Home Office to buy a new bulb, as apparently "Dr" John Reid cleaned the place out when he finally stood down as Home Secretary. However they only raised the threat level after all the terrorist activity had taken place. I'm no expert in such matters but it would seem to make sense, at least chronologically to issue these warnings before the baddies did their thing. One can imagine Jaqui Smith aboard the sinking Titanic, yelling "Red Warning... Watch out for those tricksy Icebergs... has anyone got a Red Flag?". In all seriousness, according to MI5 Guidelines, the threat level should only be raised to Critical if there is specific intelligence of an impending attack. However the Home Office and security services have made it clear that they have no such intelligence, which proves that these "threat levels" are nothing more than a political gimmick, that are there purely for the Politicians to show that they are doing something. Though it's a little out of date I've discovered an excellent table that accurately sets out exactly what each terror level means: